Today I met again with my children, the first time since March 2007. (Hurray!) This was despite set backs over the usual holidays and other commitments that I have become used to hearing. The venue was a room in an anonymous looking room in the centre of Wakefield, west Yorkshire. The concept of ‘supervised contact’ is one which I have become cynical of since the last time in what can only be described as a shit hole in the centre of Hull. In this instance for supervised read looked on by a bunch of wannabe social worker types who’s only concern was that I didn’t take a photo of my children, while my sour faced ex wife looked on between her Seduce.
The room in Wakefield was subtly but significantly different. Now, ‘supervised’ was just what it said on the tin. My supervisor was a lady who, at least on first meeting, seemed to at last have the interests of the children at heart whilst all other peripheral matters take a back row seat. Refreshing. She wanted to see me for an hour prior to my meeting the children to discuss “terms and conditions”. To me this seemed overly long but at least it gave me the chance also to discuss with her my feelings on the issue and to put forward my reservations.
The hour soon passed and I was then taken into the room where I would be with my children and told to wait. Ruby & Mils burst into the room full of both excitement and obvious trepidation. I soon overcome that by outstretching my arms and welcoming them both in a big hug that lasted for what seemed like 10 minutes. Miles was his usual charming self and Ruby took the lead by telling me what they had done that day and that Miles had a new pair of sandals. Both of them, to me, looked awfully thin, Miles more so than Ruby. I thought to myself that it will no doubt be down to the fact that their mother is a vegetarian and that this may have rubbed off on them and so there would be less opportunity for them to gain weight by eating meat. I didn’t mention it to them though. It was a hot day today and Ruby’s summer dress was lovely and she had her hair down which I always liked best. Miles was wearing shorts and was tanned from the holiday they had just taken in Cornwall. We did some drawing on the whitewall and some colouring on the table then Ruby and I played twister for a short time.
All too soon the time was up and they had to leave me. I was called back into the 1st room and given what can only be described as a debrief. The lady seemed pleased that I had not turned out to be the latent axe murderer the paperwork had me down as. She told me that I asked too many questions which surprised me a little. She then confessed to me that prior to the children coming into the room she had devised with the children a special signal that they would show if they wanted to leave the room but that they had not felt the slightest inclination to use it. She then told me that she had asked the children if they wanted to come and seem me again in 2 weeks time and that they has said yes. She looked at me as though I should show delight and surprise at this news.
I am pleased with the way this 1st meet went and relish the prospect of a 2nd one even more.
Beverley Witham may win the occasional battle, but she can never win the war that she thinks she can.
The room in Wakefield was subtly but significantly different. Now, ‘supervised’ was just what it said on the tin. My supervisor was a lady who, at least on first meeting, seemed to at last have the interests of the children at heart whilst all other peripheral matters take a back row seat. Refreshing. She wanted to see me for an hour prior to my meeting the children to discuss “terms and conditions”. To me this seemed overly long but at least it gave me the chance also to discuss with her my feelings on the issue and to put forward my reservations.
The hour soon passed and I was then taken into the room where I would be with my children and told to wait. Ruby & Mils burst into the room full of both excitement and obvious trepidation. I soon overcome that by outstretching my arms and welcoming them both in a big hug that lasted for what seemed like 10 minutes. Miles was his usual charming self and Ruby took the lead by telling me what they had done that day and that Miles had a new pair of sandals. Both of them, to me, looked awfully thin, Miles more so than Ruby. I thought to myself that it will no doubt be down to the fact that their mother is a vegetarian and that this may have rubbed off on them and so there would be less opportunity for them to gain weight by eating meat. I didn’t mention it to them though. It was a hot day today and Ruby’s summer dress was lovely and she had her hair down which I always liked best. Miles was wearing shorts and was tanned from the holiday they had just taken in Cornwall. We did some drawing on the whitewall and some colouring on the table then Ruby and I played twister for a short time.
All too soon the time was up and they had to leave me. I was called back into the 1st room and given what can only be described as a debrief. The lady seemed pleased that I had not turned out to be the latent axe murderer the paperwork had me down as. She told me that I asked too many questions which surprised me a little. She then confessed to me that prior to the children coming into the room she had devised with the children a special signal that they would show if they wanted to leave the room but that they had not felt the slightest inclination to use it. She then told me that she had asked the children if they wanted to come and seem me again in 2 weeks time and that they has said yes. She looked at me as though I should show delight and surprise at this news.
I am pleased with the way this 1st meet went and relish the prospect of a 2nd one even more.
Beverley Witham may win the occasional battle, but she can never win the war that she thinks she can.
